"Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is head of the wife as also Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body. Now as the church submits to Christ, so wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as also Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, to make her holy, cleansing her in the washing of water by the word. He did this to present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hates his own flesh, but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, since we are members of His body. 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church. To sum up, each one of you is to love his wife as himself, and the wife is to respect her husband. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, because this is right. 'Honor your father and mother-' which is the first commandment with a promise- 'that is may go well with you and that you may have a long life in the land.' And fathers, don't stir up anger in your children, but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." Ephesians 5:22-6:4 (CSB)This passage of Ephesians is one of the most quoted, and probably most misunderstood of them all. It calls for husbands to take charge over the family, as Christ did so with the church, and for children to be obedient to their parents, as Jesus was with his earthly father and mother (Luke 2:51-52). Now, these words can be misinterpreted and twisted around to define the complete opposite of their original meaning, so I'll try my best to debunk some of the myths behind this passage.
Men often like quoting "wives, live in submission to your husbands," about as often as parents justify their actions with "children, obey your parents." By no means does this give absolute authority to men to order around both wives and children as they please, simply because the Word of God says so. With the authority that the Lord gives husbands and parents, He also sets limits. For example, everyone must submit to Christ, as He is the head of the church, or in this case, this Christian family. So, husbands, treat your wife as you would yourself, with the love and respect every human being deserves. Take care of her, as Christ takes care of His church, and she will take care of you, as the church joyfully gives back to God. In the same way, parents, treat your children with respect, and they will come to do the same for you, as well as for the Lord. Sure, you may expect your kids to unquestioningly obey your every command, but it simply does not work that way. As their is a good reason behind every action of God, there should be the same positive reason driving the actions of the parents. And that reason should not be hidden, else it "provoke children to wrath," as Paul warns. Perhaps my perspective is a bit off, because I am still a child, but I believe the response of "because I told you so" can invite rebellion into the hearts and minds of the children.
All in all, there is a distinct reason why we are seeing more and more dysfunctional, broken families across the world: less of those families spend time in the Word, where they would learn such lessons as this passage teaches, to keep order and tranquility in the home. A man named David Reuben once said, "A marriage is like a long trip in a rowboat. If one passenger starts to rock the boat, the other one has to steady it. Otherwise, they will both go to the bottom together." How well that illustrates the mutual responsibilities and mutual concerns that must be a part of marriage." As with the two partners needing to work together in marriage, everyone must work together to ensure proper survival of a family.
If recovering from wisdom teeth removal has taught me one thing, it's this: Your family loves you, and would do anything that you need them to do for you, whether it be keeping you comfortable as you rest, to making sure you take the proper medication to ensure you make a full and speedy recovery. I'm very grateful for all that my family and extended family has done for me, from simple prayers to dropping off chocolate milkshakes. What the world truly needs are more loving, caring people as yourselves.
- Alex Baldwin
